Someone posted this list in one of my book groups. As a toddler mom, I laughed. This list is meant for a very specific type of bookish person. They have one job, disposable income, no kids, ample free time, reliable transportation, and NO ONE ELSE.

It’s terrible so I’m reading it for filth.

1-4 Bwahahaha

5-7 These are mostly doable, although I can trust my brutish spawn around paper yet. Fortunately, our libraries have board books.

8 & 10 OK

9 You lost me at collage

11 I’ll tweet it. Maybe.

12-14 I’ll do that with all that uninterrupted free time I have working part time and wrangling a toddler.

15 Fucking where Susan?

16 A plant because I need another to keep the toddler and dog from getting into

17-20 No.

21 Are you volunteering to babysit?

22 I live in a condo. Whose lawn am I using?

23 I actually kind of want to do this so I’m not mad at it

24-26 Bwahahaha

27 I do want to do this. I’ve only been to one branch in my county

28 Moot

29-32 With all that free time I don’t have. My area is pretty liberal so I’d have to fight censorship elsewhere.

33 I have a kid. This is a daily occurrence for even mediocre parents.

34 & 35 When?

36 Fun in theory

37 Fun idea if you have slightly older kids

38 Done it. I like reading while walking on the treadmill but lack the free time.

39 Maybe

40 & 42 This costs money. Keep it.

41 & 44 Or I could keep focusing on books I’ll enjoy. Fun idea for someone else.

43, 45, 46, & 48 When?

47 & 49 I’m in.

50 & 51 Bwahahaha

52 Solid idea

Less than 10 of these are things I want to spend my limited time on. A quarter of these made me say “You know there’s a pandemic, right?”

I suspect there’s 2 reasons the author thought this breathtakingly tone deaf list was worth ‘printing.’ She young and naive enough to not realize not everyone lives the way she does. She’s old enough to know better but is too insulated or self-involved to care.

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